Dark Room
by Lady Akita
Summary: Josh has had better days.


Title: Dark Room  
Author: Lady Akita  
Rating: PG  
Pairing: Josh/Sam  
Warnings: Slash, melodrama  
Disclaimer: Not mine.  
Word Count: 1,336

Dark Room

The room was dark. Well, dim maybe. There was light coming in through the blinds from the street, where the streetlight was actually working for the first time in six months. He wasn't really all that surprised; it wasn't as if he'd really been living here for the last three years, much less the last six months. The couch in Toby's office had seen more action than his bed had in over three years. He thought that a disgrace, really, especially because his bed was quite comfortable. Comfortable to the point that it was a shame he was still standing and staring out of the window instead of sleeping his bed – which he hadn't seen in almost two weeks.

After the day he'd had, he really wished that the room was dark, that it was dark outside so that he wouldn't know the difference between the darkness in his head and the darkness around him. A failed treaty, a situation in the Mid-East, the President fighting with the First Lady again, an oncoming scandal release and a speech to give to a group of school children who couldn't care less that the President of the United States was speaking to them anymore than if it was their Principal. Some days it did not pay to get out of bed and today had been the day that is in the dictionary as the set example of why some days it does not pay to get out of bed.

A knock at the door didn't make him turn around. He had watched Sam pull up and walk to his building. Had watched Sam let himself in and knew that if he didn't answer the door Sam might very well just go back to his own apartment and leave him alone for the night. It wasn't a very good chance, but he had hope that something had to go right today, if only just this.

Another knock at the door and then the sound of a key turning in the lock. He hadn't bothered to put the security chain up when he'd slammed into the apartment around 10:30pm – it had to be after 1 now – so the door opened without a problem, as soundless as it always had been. If nothing else it told him that his super was nice enough to make sure the hinges stayed oiled for him.

"Josh?" Sam asked, locking the door behind him and securing the chain. For a moment, Josh thought that Sam hadn't seen him – it was dark in the apartment without any of the lights on – but he'd forgotten for the moment that he was standing at the window where the light was streaming in through the blinds from the streetlight that was finally working. Sam had probably seen his shadow at the window when he was walking up to the building. "Josh, why are you standing in the dark?"

"Go away, Sam," he replied. He was tired and he rubbed his face, wishing that Sam would just leave. "Go home and get some sleep."

Sam took off his coat and tossed it over the chair where he'd put his suitcase; the same chair where Josh had tossed both his own coat and his backpack. "Leo called a meeting after he sent you home."

"Good for Leo. Go home, Sam. You need your sleep." Josh closed his eyes and leaned forward until his forehead was against the chilled glass. He could feel the cold air against his cheeks.

"So do you, but that isn't why I'm here." Sam was quiet, most people didn't really know that, but he was even quieter than CJ when he wanted to be, and now was apparently one of those times because he was behind Josh when he said that and Josh hadn't heard him move across the room. He hadn't even made the squeaky floorboard that squeaked when the wind blew squeak when he tread on it and Josh knew that he had because that damned floorboard was about a foot and a half thick (he lived in a very old building) so he couldn't have just stepped around it. Josh jumped.

"Leo asked me to pass along a message to you," Sam said. Josh jumped again when Sam wrapped his arms around his waist and placed his chin on Josh's shoulder. Sam was surprisingly warm for someone who had just been outside in the frigid February weather. Or maybe he'd just been standing at the window for too long. "He said that as long as he has a job, you have a job. As long as he has a job, we have a job. The President agrees. CJ, Donna, Toby, Margaret, Carol, Ainsley and Bonnie all agree. So do I."

Josh sighed. "That's a nice platitude, but we both know that that isn't going to stop anything."

Sam rolled his eyes. Josh could _feel_ him roll his eyes; knew he rolled his eyes, because that was what Sam always did when he thought that Josh was doing something so unexplainably stupid. "Josh…"

"No, Sam." Josh pulled away wearily. He felt even colder than he had before Sam had shown up. "Go home. Its all over. At least I can make sure that this doesn't ruin anything for the President."

"Josh, stop being stupid!" Sam snapped. His blue eyes flashed in the light from the streetlight and something in Josh's heart pinged. Like some small piece had broken off – it hurt. "You aren't going to ruin anything for the President. You haven't ruined anything for the President.

"You haven't."

Josh laughed and turned away from him, unable to watch him hurting, unable to let Sam see himself hurting. "Go home, Sam."

"I am home." Sam sounded determined, like he always did when he was fighting for something up and across a thousand miles of imaginary mountains. "Damn it, Joshua! I am home. At the risk of sounding so completely cliché, you are home for me and I don't care what anyone else says! Screw the Republicans and the left and right wings and anyone else who thinks this is wrong because we both have Y-chromosomes.

"I won't leave you, not when you're hurting or when you're being stupid and especially when you're being both. Why the hell can't you trust us? Trust me? Are we really that unimportant? Do we really come off as that stupid to you?" He grabbed Josh's shoulder and spun him around. "We aren't letting you walk away from this."

Josh closed his eyes again and all he could see replaying in his mind was this afternoon, when CJ had received the photos, when Leo had called them in, when the President had been told and he just wanted to collapse, knowing that he'd let them all down and he just…he just. He just wanted to crawl into his bed, his nice comfortable bed and sob his heart out like he had for weeks after Joanie had died.

"You need to leave."

"No, I need to stay here. With you."

"No, Sam, just…"

"Josh! I'm not leaving. Get used to the idea." Sam was glaring still and Josh felt it. The heat of it searing him where he stood. There was silence and the silence stretched for several minutes with Sam glaring at him and he just stood there with Sam's hand on his shoulder and his eyes closed. Finally Sam sighed.

"Look. Let's just go to bed. We have to be in early tomorrow."

"Sam…"

"Josh. I love you. You're not being fired. We have to be in early tomorrow. Get used to the idea. In fact, I suggest we sleep on it. In your bed, which is just in the other room." He started toward the bedroom, pulling Josh along with him and Josh followed reluctantly.

"Everything will look better in the morning. I promise," Sam swore after he'd gotten them both under the covers.

From where he was curled up against Sam's bared chest, Josh prayed so.


End file.
